The one truth is that each of us faces and tries to overcome a separation, completely differently! Another truth is that scientists are still dealing with this issue, as well wish to examine, how our body and our mind responds to all this!
The reason; Because quite simply when we experience a separation, there are ups and downs.
An intense separation also creates intense emotions!
We know it very well, those of us who have experienced it! We feel like we're suddenly losing ground under our feet, especially when it comes to a sudden breakup! For a separation, which we did not want to include in our immediate plans. The first thoughts that cross our minds, once we realize what happened, are that we will be alone forever and that we will never get over it! Something completely reasonable and normal!
The above thoughts are derivatives of pain and frustration and unfortunately or fortunately, they cross everyone's mind! Perhaps the fact that we are not alone in all this, and that we all experience similar situations, is finally a relief! But the question remains and requires answers:
Ythere is finally a way, to help ourselves, so that suffer as little as possible;
And the answer is that from a scientific point of view, everything might be more possible and less painless.
The researchers in their study concluded that focusing on the negative elements of the relationship, helps to get over a breakup more easily. In this way, we feel less distressed. It is also important not to criticize ourselves but to recognize and accept our feelings. And finally, not to focus exclusively on the separation and the bad feelings it causes us, but to find ways out (Langeslag, SJE, & Sanchez, ME, 2018). They also noticed that the last way improves, not only our dealing with the separation, but also our overall mood!
All this is fine, but each of us works differently! So we better try and see which of the above is more suitable for us. It matters in a separation, to be there! Observers of body and mind! To be aware of what is happening inside us, so that we are able to realize what can help us.
And let's remember that if we don't help ourselves first, no one else will!
Source:
Langeslag, SJE, & Sanchez, ME (2018). Down-regulation of love feelings after a romantic break-up: Self-report and electrophysiological data. Journal of Experimental Psychology: General, 147(5), 720–733. https://doi.org/10.1037/xge0000360
